As a parent of a teen, I often find myself wondering, am I missing anything with my teenage daughters? Should I be asking more questions? And then I think, of course I am missing something; I am human. The trick is to not miss the really important stuff that could happen to any of our children – depression, bullying, drug use. And I do always remind myself to ask the important questions. Is she ok? Is he happy? Do I need to intervene?
And then there are the not so important questions that probably come up as a mom of teens, more often than we realize. It seems as the years go by, and our children grow up and change, we change, too. And like we had to pick our battles with our toddlers, when raising teens, it is healthy to let go our perfectionism and rules. But, letting ourselves off the hook can result is some strange and often funny questions we may not even realize we are asking ourselves. The ones we probably don’t ask out loud.
Here are just a few of the questions I have come to know well that all go on inside my head:
1. After stumbling upon a pile of clothes, unfolded, stuffed in our teenager’s drawer. Are these dirty or clean? If they are dirty, will it kill her to wear it again?
2. Is it ok that the swear word my teenage daughter uses most, is the same one I use most?
3. While lying on the couch exhausted and I cannot get up, is it hypocritical to have pizza delivered two nights in a row when I keep reminding my teens to eat healthy?
4. Do I really need to shower every day? I mean, wasn’t deodorant specifically invented for this circumstance?
5. If I think for half a second that I am being followed on the way to the grocery store does that mean I should stop binge-watching Homeland? Is this what our kids feel like on a regular basis?
6. Is, “worrying whenever my teen goes out at night induced insomnia,” a diagnosable syndrome?
7. Maybe ketchup can count as a vegetable if we are pressed for time and did not have a chance to go to the market to pick up salad stuff. Did anyone actually hear me think that?
8. Am I completely misusing and taking advantage of the black leggings fashion trend if I wear them every day?
9. Why do I not like how much my teenagers are on the phone, but text them a lot more than is necessary? (Even while they are in class)
10. Am I weird if the last thing I think about at night is, will Reese Witherspoon will make another movie soon? I mean, come on, didn’t you see Legally Blonde? Wild? Walk the Line?
11. Does keeping up with the Joneses have to include always buying organic, having a shed free dog like a Goldendoodle or Cockapoo, or debating vaccine use? Spoiler alert: dog hair is sometimes a condiment in our house.
12. Does eating a piece of cheesecake or a bowl of ice cream in the laundry room while folding clothes count as calories?
13. If I don’t mind catching a cold, and then needing to stay in bed for two days, having my husband care for me, is this bad? Does this count as a sexual fantasy?
14. Did anyone actually see me wearing this outfit yesterday?
15. Can my Amazon Prime membership get revoked from overuse especially when our college sophomore has the login and pass code memorized?
Although, I have shared 15 of these sometimes silly but very real thoughts we as moms can have, I must admit, there are more.
But like many things, some things in life are truly better left unsaid.