One year ago, we dropped our oldest off at college. The months leading up to this mind- bending milestone were like a wild ride on an invisible emotional roller coaster. Senior year was a gradual, anticipatory ascent up to the first peak. We celebrated each senior ritual, one by one, before pausing all the way at the top to enjoy the sweeping, picture-perfect views on graduation day.
All smiles in the sun.
Then, in a split second, the bottom dropped out from under us. Summer flew past in a dizzying blur.
Days flashed by way, way too fast until – somehow – there we were, standing in her finished dorm room with nothing left to do. The roller coaster had coming to a screeching halt.
We stepped outside the dorm, tired, dazed, awkward, unsteady. We hugged her, watched her walk away, and held it together as best we could without barfing.
She thrived. We survived the ride. And so will you!
For the first timers out there, here are a few tips we learned along the way.
5 Lessons Learned Dropping My Oldest at College
1) No Matchmaking
It’s time for you to retire from social matchmaking. Don’t expect them to spend the summer texting or snapping “so-and-so’s friend’s cousin” who is also going to be a freshman. If they’re meant to be friends, they will find each other on campus.
2) Quietly Get Tactical
While your kid is busy with Pinterest mood boards and brainstorming the vibe of the room, you can quietly run a simultaneous covert, more tactical operation. Ask parents of older students at your college for move-in day photos of their freshman dorm room. It is the most helpful way to figure out exactly what you need, and what you don’t.
3) Don’t Overpack
The more you unpack into that tiny room, the less space they’ll have in that tiny room. They don’t need a semester’s supply of shampoo. This isn’t the time for a Costco run. You raised them to be able to buy a new tube of toothpaste when this one runs out.
4) Efficiency Wins
Pack one “work bag” that stays with you throughout move-in day. Put the scissors, tape, tools, hooks, extension cords, water, snacks, phone charger, and essentials in that bag, and never let it out of your sight.
5) Get In, Get to Work, Get Out
This is a military operation. Make sure everyone in the room has a clear role, or swiftly get them out of the room. Tensions will be high, space is confined, and the team is meeting for the first time on the day of the mission. Plan accordingly.
One last thing: Do not – seriously do not – try to build furniture inside a tiny dorm room on move-in day. Assemble ahead of time.
Oh, and pack tissues in your work bag.
More Great Reading:
Eight Things to Remember on the Drive Back Home After Drop Off
