The Day Women Took Over Harvard Business School

Dear Harvard Business School,

Celebrating 50 years of women MBA graduates is a major milestone and please accept my sincere thanks for inviting me to the big bash.

Here is what I loved about last week’s “W50 Summit:”

*I spent time with 800 women, 99% of whom I had never met before. We struck up conversations at every opportunity and discovered the varied paths each of us has taken since graduation. Women in their 20s, their 70s, married, single, gay, straight, SAHM, moms who have worked every day since they graduated – all in. There was no judgement, no mommy battles, just deep curiosity and respect.

* We listened to Drew Gilpin Faust, the first female President of Harvard University, welcome us and speak of how educating girls around the world is “fair, smart and transformative.” The standing ovation we gave her was the first of many.

* I met women from the first class (‘65) and imagined what it was like to be one of the eight who studied beside 676 men. Unlike the men who resided in dorms on campus, they lived across the Charles River. Barred from the campus dining room, they brought their lunches and used makeshift ladies rooms still equipped with urinals.

* We listened to Sheryl Sandberg (‘95, COO, Facebook) remind the SRO crowd, “to believe in ourselves, to keep raising our hands, to take a seat at the table.” And, if anyone describes a little girl as “bossy,” correct them, saying that she has “early leadership potential.” These were words every one of us could have used when we were still in your classrooms.

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The Tragedy Behind my Class Reunion

Posted on 10/20/12 by Grown and Flown

Mary Dell writes: There are reunion people and non-reunion people and I am one of the former. The invitation arrives and, almost immediately, I add my name to the list of attendees. I returned for my 30th class reunion last weekend, like I have done every five years, not only to see my former classmates, but also to revisit the painful and tragic memory of one friend, in particular. She is the reason I think I will never miss a gathering. For her, in memoriam, I can only offer tears.

We were members of a post-graduate program that was large, 750-people large, and far away from our hometowns. It took us southerners just about one week to find each other. We created a social island, several dozen strong, where it felt like home – Atlanta or Austin - instead of the banks of the Charles River.

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Spinning Class – Exercise for the “Lazy”

Posted on 9/21/12 by Grown and Flown

Mary Dell writes: In the realm of athletics I am a dud, both coordination and motivation-challenged. When I attended BlogHer’12 this summer and heard Katie Couric describe herself as “lazy” (regarding exercise) yet willing to ride a stationary bike in a spinning class, I began to wonder if this might be a good workout for me since I’m a little lazy, too.

As if the gym gods were sending me a message, I picked up More magazine’s September issue and found an article on spinning inside. I read about SoulCycle, a small but growing chain of spinning studios that happen to be Katie’s choice. Continue reading →

I Love Hate Blogging

Posted on 8/9/12 by Grown and Flown

We were blogging virgins. Neither of us had any idea what a blog was and had never read one, let alone written one. But as we have dipped our toes into this corner of the social network and are now up to our knees, I have realized a few things:

I love:

Thinking about parenting issues with the clarity that writing imposes.

Meeting people all over the world. I guess I could have done this with an airplane, but my computer, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest and our blog are so much easier.

Trying to think of something original to say. On the rare moments that it happens, it makes my brain sing. Continue reading →

Thank you, Mrs. Ainslie, for being in The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel

Posted on 7/12/12 by Grown and Flown

From Mary Dell:

Airplane trips offer few comforts – no food, uncomfortable seats, dreary in-flight entertainment. Last week, however, on a flight with my family, American Airlines offered a movie I wanted to see. The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel was well worth it. One of the main characters, Mrs. Ainslie, was a disagreeable woman who nagged her husband, complained about everything, and feared leaving the hotel to which they had traveled. Continue reading →

“When Did You Know Your Dog Needed Pet Therapy?”

Posted on 5/18/12 by Grown and Flown

Mary Dell writes: At lunch with a new friend, I chatted about attending pet therapy. Very delicately she asked “When did you know your dog needed therapy?” I must have skipped a few crucial details in discussing how I work with my dog to give, not receive, treatment.

Slipping the lanyard with the pair of IDs over my head, I walk to the car and open the door for my partner. He jumps in the back, waiting for me to lower the window and, soon enough, I see him in the rear view mirror – head out, ears flapping back, and tail rhythmically wagging. I swear he is smiling. Continue reading →

Please Accept My Apology

Posted on 4/19/12 by Grown and Flown

Kara Gebhart Uhl, who blogs at Pleiades Bee, published a great piece a couple of weeks ago that resonated with thousands of readers. She issued an open apology to all parents she had judged so harshly during her child-free years. I, like many of the 47,000 others who shared her post, had the proverbial been there, done that moment. But as I hover at the mid-century mark of life I, too, feel the need to issue my apology to all women who crossed my path for the past five decades and in the quietest, never to be uttered part of my brain I thought, I would never dress like that, act like that, eat like that or treat my kids like that and, here is the kicker, if I were her age. Well here I am, officially her age, and now it all looks, well, so completely different.

So my apologies. Continue reading →